Honestly speaking, after all these years of studying Buddhism, i realise that i seriously do not know what buddhism is about! I do not know what the Buddha was talking about, what the ancient teachers were talking about, or what the modern teachers are talking about. I do not know what they are refering to or what meditation or mindfulness is all about. I really have no idea! And don't see what they mean. In the end, i only know what i know. If someone asks me about buddhism, i usually do not know what to say, i only know what i know, what do i know about buddhism? However, to resolve the situation, i just answer with the ancient teachers' answer.
Ultimately, what can i do? One can only live my life based on what one knows. If i ask myself if my understanding is the same as the buddha's or ancients? How do i know really; how can one know?? One can only live one's life based on what one knows. There is no other way. No way to live your life based on something you don't know!
Then i ask myself if i am chasing their tail to understand what they know? I can only say yes. They know something that i don't which helps them. I am chasing that in hope that it can help me too! I want to know the secret that they know! What do i know? Just trying to chase their tail.
Ultimately, what can i do? One can only live my life based on what one knows. If i ask myself if my understanding is the same as the buddha's or ancients? How do i know really; how can one know?? One can only live one's life based on what one knows. There is no other way. No way to live your life based on something you don't know!
Then i ask myself if i am chasing their tail to understand what they know? I can only say yes. They know something that i don't which helps them. I am chasing that in hope that it can help me too! I want to know the secret that they know! What do i know? Just trying to chase their tail.
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